LET’S GET SWEATY!



Ever wonder if your Chief Judge is well-endowed?  Or circumcised?  Well, if you happen to practice in Key West, we may be able to help you.

The above snaps are from dating sites including Manhunt, posted by “DavidKW“, who bears a remarkable resemblance to David Audlin, the current Chief Judge of Florida’s 16th Judicial Circuit.

Messages to Audlin’s office asking him to confirm/deny ownership of the postings weren’t returned by deadline.  Alas, other questions we also posed via his judicial assistant and voice mail referencing the Judicial Canons remain unanswered as well. 

In any event, judges are people too.  Dating sites are A-OK in our book.  But, does it amount to an appearance of impropriety for a judge to advertise his gavel length and width, or fudge on the “What I do” bio section by stating “Attorney“?  And since Key West is a small town, shouldn’t everyone be on notice if they’re hanging with a judge, to avoid the surprise of a lifetime if they ever have to go down to the courthouse?

More unchartered terrain courtesy of the rapidly expanding world of social media.  And there won’t be a clear answer unless the JEAC weighs in.  So, for now … you make the call!

*UPDATE* – Audlin’s JA stated at 2:40 PM that the judge has “no comment” after we called to see if he had reviewed this post …

93 thoughts on “LET’S GET SWEATY!”

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    Great! I’m sitting at my desk, getting a big kick out of this homo’s profile when my adminstrative assistant walks straight over to my computer to assist with a password problem. Now, I am sure, I am officially the biggest closet homo, looking at postings of bald, gay men with ,09 peckers on Manhunt!! There is nothing I can do…….do I run out to the other associates office’s and try to persuade them that I was reading a legal blog…….I AM FUKED !!!!

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    Guys in my high school used to cruise gay hookup sites pretending to look for blog stories. It was no big deal.

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    Bill, This has gone too far. This is not nice and next time I see you, I am going to tell you how much I am disappointed in you.

    gay lawyer

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    Today, in Miami Drug Ct, judge Jeri Cohen forced a girlfriend of a defendant to do a drug test over her objection.
    When will they learn they are not God and cannot do things to people who they have no jurisdiction over.

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    They will never learn because they are paid to keep the trains moving on time and thus allowed to do whatever they damn well please in court and in their personal lives.

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    “Let’s get sweaty”??? This dude is way down the list on the peter meter. Bet he’s lying about that too. LOL

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    I STRONGLY disagree.

    This is PRECISELY the kind of blogging needed across Florida.

    White/Black/Brown/Straight/Gay/Transgender Judges everywhere need to be reminded they are REQUIRED to lead dignified lives 24/7.

    Don’t broadcast your cock size, Your Honor.

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    I use to see a certain gay miami judge on grindr. I did not feel the need to out him on the blog. It was amusing since he lied about his age on there. All in good fun…..I don’t have a problem with a judge being on manhunt…..

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    Why would the geezer in the picture lie about his age and not give himself a 9 incher while he’s at it?

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    Pretty funny except for the unfortunate length of this guy’s attention span.
    What a winner. Notice I didn’t say weener.

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    I believe going to work as a judge drunk on the bench is far more newsworthy then someone posting on a dating website

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    Stay in the hate filled cesspool you practice in, Gelin. Judge Audlin is well liked by the Monroe bar. He is well respected by the Monroe bar. It may come as a surprise to a pompous, mightier than thou person like yourself, but most legal communities in this state are the opposite of Broward’s. In the civilized world, far away from SE 6th Street, we don’t spend our days looking to “out” people. And, not for nothin’, but David Audlin’s judicial acumen, notably his temperament on the bench, is the type you’re constantly decrying the lack of in Broward. This post confirms what a little man you truly are.

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    the responses would have been similar if the add was about a straight male or female or lesbian judge or chief judge

    “Lack of Judgement” of an elected official

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    Of course Judge Audlin wasn’t in the closet. The outing is Bill Gelin putting people’s personal lives on display for his own jollies. This is someone’s personal dating life, not a criminal episode. Gay, straight, whatever, the posting here, and the responses suggesting this has something to do with his judgment, or lack thereof are ridiculous.

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    Speaking of tutor, the guy hasn’t raised a dime and last time he ran before he got appointed he took 13% of he vote. Low hanging fruit for someone who wants circuit.

    IHOP has a great special on the rooty tooty fresh and fruity breakfast this month.

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    It’s Key West, DB. What do you expect? If you didn’t have some versatile lonely heart chief judge spillin his beans on Manhunt with his prick size, you’d have some cross dresser showing up on the bench for Monday morning magistrate hearings.

    Surprised it’s not another broward judge you’re talking about. We’ve got plenty here with small man complexes. Allot of drunks too apparently.

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    The only issue I see is in relation to the veracity of the posted information. Is it ok for a Judge to say I’m a lawyer, when they are clearly a constitutional officer? As far as the rest, its empirical and easy to handle. Send a JQC investigator down there with a tape measure and match up the findings with the advertised numbers. No biggie.

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    This amounts to nothing more than a JQC Fireside Chat, only this time dinner will be served complemented by a thoughtful wine selection and intimate lighting.

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    He moved to Key West in the 80s from California. I don’t think he was outed here either. Just the facts.

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    If you are an elected public official anything you say or do will be open to public scrutiny. This guy should have given a little more thought before inviting people to get sweaty with him.

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    I’d have serious problems with this guy hearing my case. Anyone who exhibits such imprudent behavior deserves to have the public in on his or her private life because it carries over to their official duties and the decisions included in occupying such a position.

    Throwing around his penis size and including nude pics on the internet gives me serious doubts about his state of mind the rest of the time.

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    v/b=versatile bottom, which means oooo give it to me harder, and on occasion, take this judicial pole you b**ch. insertion. Masc=no fem here, total guy, expect me grunt deeply and not whimper like a girl. Random=will play with anything with balls. NSA=”no strings attached”: don’t cry that you love me after I pork the hell out you.

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    Nothing surprises me anymore, just glad it isn’t Whiney Weinstein’s specs plastered all over the place! Thank our maker he seems to spend all his time trying to make excuses for drunk judges instead.

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    Wish you could say it should be beneath the dignity of what sits on the bench, but with what we’ve seen happen in Broward the past several years, it’s just about in line with what u’d expect from these clowns.
    This weirdo looks like Ken Jen back from the dead with a message !

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    You don’t have to wonder what this guy is doing with his nights. He’ll probably be re-elected with an overwhelming majority.

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    Polly Penis says he better stick with anatomically correct blow-up dolls in the future. By the looks of things, the self advertising nature of his pitch ain’t filling his dance card.

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    Dear Chief Judge Audlin: Try “The Monster” in Key West durring your lunch hour. It’s got just what you’re looking for. If you can’t get laid there, you’re outta luck buddy.

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    Quite a few chuckles about this one in all three courtrooms I’ve been in already. Somebody stupid enough to post pictures of himself in a state of undress isn’t going to fly very well whether it’s Monroe or Broward.

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    Too bad I’m not wired that way. It looks like some gay guys get laid more in a month than I’ve been my whole life.

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    This is wildly inappropriate. The sexual identity and personal postings of judges is none of my business – str8 gay or questioning…the only thing i care about is their demeanor and intellectual honesty on the bench…the comments are equally embarrassing and not worthy of lawyers who have the privilege of practicing in South Florida

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    This is embarrassing and mainstream America will want him out of office quicker that you can say Anthony Weiner.

    Would Obama be able to get away with this?

    Hell No, and Judges are arguably held to an even higher standard than legislators, etc.

    He gets no special breaks because he’s gay.

    All electeds must behave with dignity or get a different job.

    Thou shalt not broadcast your cock size mr elected official.

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    You gotta luv these idiot judges!
    Like our chief judge, Audlin probably has no case load, and thusly has too much time on his hands and so this is what happens.
    If they simply rotated judges like they do in other circuits I’ve worked in and made them work for the inordinate amount of money and benefits they are being paid by public funds, you might be able to limit the amount of trouble they seem to find their way into over and over. (This internet fiasco being just the latest occurring in Monroe County, and this string of drunken judges in Broward).
    But, no, as seems to be the case, they like all the perks and think they are too important to work like everybody else and even do a poor job at that.

    And here I was thinking it was just Broward that had all the judicial boobs!
    Put them to work, make them accountable, and most importantly vote them out of office every time they are up for re-election.
    Think of the money it would save tax payers not having to pay all their pensions which is what draws these particular boobs to the job in the first place!

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    Hey Gelin, who the F uses Sprint as a Wireless carrier anyway? And why do you have the Manhunt App downloaded on your phone?

    I’d like to find out when you bought that app before you wrote this article. If its more than a day, we know you were trolling for c*ck.

    I knew the long hair meant something.

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    Are you freakin kidding Dude?
    The guy puts himself out there….Big time in the pubic eye (lol) and anybody has the nerve to critisize Bill for publishing what the well endowed jurist has already taken the liberty of doing??? Gimme a break!

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    This judge knew what he was doing! Just because he has trouble getting a date isn’t anybody’s problem but his own, but to be in public office and to put pictures of himself without any clothes on out on the net demonstrates very poor judgment in mu opinion.
    Whose gonna have any confidence in some dude with a 61/2 weeny anyway?
    He doesn’t sound like he’s got much confidence in himself to be doing something like this.
    He’s got nobody to blame but himself and his own bad decision. What kind of decisions can this so called judge be making on behalf of the public when he does something like this?
    Don’t c why anyone would object to blogging it when we’ve got public officials doing crap like this and getting paid by tax dollars. He deserves what he gets. He doesn’t have a problem obviously plastering his penis size and pics of himself on a sex site, so why should he be upset now about being exposed for it when he’s already exposed himself in a way that most people find highly offensive. The real question is whether he should be sitting in public office as a judge! Where do they get these people from?

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    Great stuff. This guy must be the biggest lonely loser out there. Disgusting behavior, especially for a judge. But this is nothing when compared to Broward where judges wander into court drunk and put citizens in danger of their lives on the roadways and then Chief Judge Weinstein is interviewed making flaccid excuses for judges that should have no place judging others when they can’t even control themselves when it comes to their own lives and the Bar won’t do anything about it. Sad state of affairs if you ask me.

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    Big Fucking deal…Judge Charlie Kaplan was on the corny J Date website. What is worse match.com eharmony or manhunt. At least Manhunt tells it like it is-it’s all bout fucking. The other dating websites you are forced to buy dinner. Manhunt is BJ’s right away. Bill this was uncool…..why did you do this? As long as the judge is doing a good job I could give a rat’s ass which stupid website they belong to

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    Jack Thompson here. Wow, this should be fun. I’ll be filing a sworn complaint with the JQC tomorrow regarding this clown. Because let me get this straight, so to speak: A law firm, Searcy Denney, cannot state they are an ethical firm, because that is too broad a characterization for The Bar to abide, but a sitting judge can refer to how broad his circumcised penis is? And what if that is false advertising, by the way? Shouldn’t the judge, claiming these dimensions, have to prove it in a court of law?

    I think this judge, if it is the judge, has some serious problems with the Judicial Canons, especially since he asserts, publicly, the length of his canon. As you were. I’m on the case. Jack Thompson, So Sue Me

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    John B. Thompson, J.D., M.A.
    5721 Riviera Drive
    Coral Gables, Florida 33146
    305-666-4366
    amendmentone@comcast.net

    January 16, 2014

    Judicial Qualifications Committee
    1110 Thomasville Road
    Tallahassee, Florida 32303 Via Mail and Fax to 850.9226781 and email to
    mschneider@floridajqc.com

    Re: Sworn Complaint Re 16th Circuit Chief Judge David Audlin

    Dear JQC:

    Please note that various media are reporting that the above apparent judge has been advertising his availability at a gay hook-up site called Manhunt.

    In a state in which The Florida Bar seeks to prohibit the law firm of Searcy Denney from advertising truthfully about the quality of its legal representation, this apparent Chief Judge is advertising the width, length, and circumcision of his penis, with a call to potential partners to “Let’s get sweaty.”

    Do I have to point out to the JQC what numerous Judicial Canons are violated here?

    Please proceed, and by that I don’t mean the JQC should endeavor to discover if the Judge, is engaging in false advertising, although one might say this Judge is bringing new meaning to the term “penile institution.” See the sex ad at http://abovethelaw.com/2014/01/judges-sex-ad-found-on-internet-hookup-site/ and the hard copy of the article, enclosed.

    I solemnly swear, under penalty of perjury, that the foregoing facts are true, correct, and complete, so help me God. John B. Thompson

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    Anyone, whether posting here or not, who thinks that the Judicial Canons of Florida allow a judge to do something like this and that there is nothing wrong with a sitting judge advertising his penis size and his availability for this is utterly devoid of sense and/or sanity. Even this is too much for The Bar and the Supremes to put up with.

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    Dude, you have got to be kidding me. Gelin didn’t “out” him. He outed himself. Duh. And it is not the outing we are talking about. It is a bout a jurist, a Chief Judge no less, flouting the Judicial Canons (do you even know what they are, you goofball?) by advertising the size of his penis, etc., at a sex site. Not a sex site? Then what is the “let’s get sweaty” invite about, jogging? Honestly, sir, Broward is the perfect place for you to live.

    Finally, temperament on the bench? Is that the issue? Look, this clown in a robe obviously admits he did something outrageous here because he pulled the ad and will not comment to the media. He got caught, and his ostrich behavior is an admission against interest. If there was nothing wrong with doing this, then why doesn’t he say, “Yeah, I did it so what?” But he’s not doing that. He’s admitting he was wrong, unethical, stupid, and not worthy to sit as a judge.

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    To all those outraged at this: this person is not representative of all Gay people, and certainly not other gay Judges.

    Levels of decorum are a personal choice.

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    To advertise you only have 6 and a half inches and are a versatile bottom is in itself not something that’s going to get this big, ugly loser any dates on manhunt, JD or any other social media and or sex site in Key West or anywhere else.
    Maybe if he was serving a 15 to life year sentence in the state pen he’d get lucky, but even then by the looks of his profile, probably not.
    This turkey is just outta luck anyway to look at it.
    Just because he’s some loser judge/attorney doesn’t make him anymore a catch unless he’s trying to cruise the homeless.
    This dude is just an unbelievable loser looking for sex in all the wrong places.
    He’d do better to invest in his vid and mag library and just chalk this one up to another bad experience. I’m sure he’s had plenty of those.
    One thing is for sure, he doesn’t belong on the bench as a judge deciding anybody else’s fate when he can’t control his 6 and a half inch urge. He’s pathetic.

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    I see Jacks back. Thank goodness for a breath of sanity in this crazy world. He’s one of few on this site that make any sense and that I seriously identify with. Please follow up on your JQC complaint against this newest 6 inch judge. He deserves to be bounced to parts unknown for doing this. If i were to run into him in KW I’d give this 6’er a real piece of my mind.

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    Don’t worry about my following up on this jqc complaint. This is a wonderful opportunity to force the jqc to abandon its left wing bias and enforce the judicial canons impartially. If a straight male judge had done this he’d be off the bench summarily. And his panicked removal of the ad and his repeated refusal to comment are admissions that even he knows he went over the ethics line. Lets get one thing straight, so to speak: this is not a dating site. It is a sexual intercourse site. Anybody who doesn’t get that is stupid, deranged, or lying.

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    Don’t know how he can deny this when he’s pictured with the same shirt on on Facebook!
    Having my coffee and laughing while I peruse the article on “Above the Law” is enough to keep me amused all day. The other girls in my condo don’t think he’s very attractive considering how many good looking hairdressers live in our complex.
    Looks like Nosferatu out of drag. Maybe he should consider another profession besides judge even in Key West. We expect this sort of thing of Broward Judges.
    Considering all the other scandals involving Broward Judges lately, this is just a teaser.
    Keep them coming JAAB! These hypocrites need to be exposed at every turn.
    We luv your site and courthouse coverage.
    My roommate used to work at the courthouse until she couldn’t take it anymore and the stories she tells make this one pale by significance; judges divorcing their wives and sleeping around like they were on Viagra twenty-four hours a day, drunk and whacked out Broward Judges doing things that would make a professional hooker blush.
    I appreciate the candor used to report these issues because I know first hand how they try to cover it all up.
    I followed the Ana Gardiner story on your site from the beginning and that was bad enough, but now this one takes it to new heights of absurdity regarding judicial scandals.

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    CONSIDERING OW DANGEROUS THIS PRACTICE IS, THIS JUDGE HAS EXHIBITED THE VERY WORST OF JUDGMENT. ARE THESE THE TYPE OF PEOPLE WE WANT SITTING AS JUDGES? I THINK NOT.PUT THIS IDIOT WHERE HE DESERVES TO BE. HE MIGHT EVEN ENJOY IT SEEING THAT THAT’S THE ONLY WAY HE’S EVER GOING TO GET HIS DANCE CARD FILLED.

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    I think this is the same site A-Turd’s on day and nite if I’m not mistaken. I’ll check it out.

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    I have received today a formal written notice from the JQC that it has in fact officially opened an inquiry as to Chief Judge Audlin’s alleged posting of his availability at a sex site (it’s not a dating site), in response to my filing of a formal sworn complaint.

    You all are welcome. Happy to oblige.

    If the JQC does not whack this guy, if the allegations prove true, then the JQC will open the door to the Republican Legislature’s next and overdue assault on the judicial branch.

    The judiciary in this state is utterly out of control, and this is their most recent opportunity to prove me right. Jack Thompson, So Sue Me

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    It’s exceptional to see this data in your post, I was appearing to be identical yet there was not any fitting asset, much obliged now I have the connection which I was searching for my examination.

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    JNC OPENING/MONROE COUNTY

    David Audlin, EsquireThings have gotten mighty hot around here. So hot, in fact, that a little more than three months after posting Let’s Get Sweaty!, the former chief judge of Monroe County is resigning from the bench, with four years left on his term. The Key West article that broke the story Friday is here, and a bit more detailed story appeared Saturday. Both articles simply state that David Audlin will be returning to private practice. Did JAABLOG light the fuse that took Audlin off the bench? And is it only a coincidence that …

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    I just learned about this last week, so I guess I am behind the times. Have been busy in US District Court and Collier County. I have lived in Key West for 13 years. I had no idea he was gay. Certainly not my type! Ugh. Off all the judges in the county, Audlin was the only one I really hated. The bar may like him and he made some important rulings, but he totally screwed pro se litigants over, especially when they knew what they were doing. He wrote orders without opinions that were required. No facts and certainly no case law. I had him disqualified and ending up having every judge in Monroe County disqualify themselves. The Supremes appointed me a judge from Miami: Spencer Eig. Boy is that a story. 4 years and still going.
    The defense has spent $145,000 (of state money) and have not shaken me yet.
    I feel a little bad for Audlin — well, not really, who am I kidding. I am glad to see him gone. Karma if you ask me. And yes, generally gay people do have more fun, although not so much ugly trolls.

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    I’d be ashamed and resign too if I only had 6 inches to brag about! This dude deserves worse for sitting as a chief judge of all things and wagging his Little Willie on the Internet.
    He’s not a victim at all. Especially when he’s being paid by public funds to play pin the tail on the donkey.
    The only victim here is the public for allowing this wanker to sit in judgment of others.

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    Really ass hole? What good does this do? You have ruined a perfectly respectable Judges career for what? Kicks. He hasn’t to my knowledge done anything against the LGBT community, he has been out sine the age of 23. You are the lowest form of human being. His profile is private and only members of ManHunt can see the entire profile, to the ass holes saying this Shit head Bill didn’t out him, he most certainly did, to the rest of the world who didn’t know him. Pieces of trash like you need to fucking drop off the face of the earth.

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    Really ass hole? What good does this do? You have ruined a perfectly respectable Judges career for what? Kicks. He hasn’t to my knowledge done anything against the LGBT community, he has been out sine the age of 23. You are the lowest form of human being. His profile is private and only members of ManHunt can see the entire profile, to the ass holes saying this Shit head Bill didn’t out him, he most certainly did, to the rest of the world who didn’t know him. Pieces of trash like you need to fucking drop off the face of the earth.

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    This blog post is utter bullshit and makes you look like a total asshole. What was the driving force behind posting his profile, aside from trying to give yourself attention?

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    1.) self righteous indignation
    2.) anger
    3.) fuck them they can’t function without me – I quit!
    4.) post quitting warm glow bravado
    5.) uh oh – where is the public outcry in support of my brave stance?
    6.) oh fuck
    7.) woe is me, what have I done?
    8.) lots of drinking and anonymous rage comments on blog
    9.) lots of sleep
    10.) shit I’m late, now I’m not going to be able to find a parking spot, the boss is going to ream me

    From the looks of things, things have already progressed to stage 8

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